February 2023

You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

– Exodus 20:16

“Do you think people are really doing the best they can?”

It’s an interesting question to consider, isn’t it? Do you think that people are actually doing as best as they can? The person who yells at the bank teller - are they doing their best? The person who cuts you off in traffic - are they doing the best they can in that moment? The church person who irks you the wrong way - are they doing their best?

What if the highest authority - let’s say, God - told you: yes. Yes, that person is doing the best they can with what they have in that moment.

When we assume someone is doing the best they can, it allows us to make more generous assumptions about their intentions. Perhaps the person yelling at the bank teller just lost their job and they’re absolutely terrified, and the best they can do in that moment is fall apart. Perhaps the person cutting you off in traffic is rushing to the hospital after being told their sibling is on life support. Or the church person who rubbed you the wrong way is worried about a family member in trouble.

This verse from Exodus 20:16 referenced above is the eighth commandment. Martin Luther wrote this part, about not bearing false witness against our neighbor, and for considering our neighbor’s words and deeds in a positive light. In the Small Catechism, Luther writes that we are called by this commandment to not tell lies about our neighbor or hurt their reputation, but we are also to, “defend him, speak well of him, and explain everything in the kindest way.”

Consider how it might change your reactions and responses to another person’s words and actions if you did your best to explain those words and actions in the kindest, most compassionate way. My sense is, it’ll soften our sometimes hardened hearts. 

The next time someone says or does something that feels like it wrongs or irks you, take a deep breath. Consider the question, what would it mean if that person is doing the best they can? See if that allows you the space you need to give them the grace and compassion we hope others will extend to us, even on our worst days.

With love, 

Pastor Kelsey